Add a P to the PPD...

Now, I don't have kids yet (which isn't all that bad now that I know - per my sister's last post - that it could lead to me eating paper to survive), so bare with me on this one...

My friend’s baby is precious, but she cried the entire time I was taking care of her. Cried might be an understatement. It was more like crying and screaming mixed together. It made me feel so bad like I was doing something wrong. I couldn’t figure it out, so I just had to let her cry.

After she left, I fell onto my bed and didn’t wake up for 2 hours and didn’t even want to get out of bed after that, but I made myself. I started thinking this might be what postpartum depression (PPD) kind of feels like. Maybe it’s a long stretch, but I think I suffered a bout of it today.........I googled it and one of the causes is “worries about your ability as a mother.” The baby crying for all 2.5 hours that I was with her put me in a huge funk and made me question my ability to be a good mom. Like…if I can’t figure this out…I’m going to be horrible at this whole mother thing…so then I just felt like sleeping the beautiful day away.

I know what your thinking, “Amy, don’t be stupid…you didn’t actually have a baby, nor are you even pregnant…there’s no way you could be suffering from that!!!” AND since I’m well aware this, I’m willing to settle on my little episode being referred to as “Pre Postpartum Depression” (PPPD)!!!

Now you're thinking I might be on to something with this theory...or just on something...period.

Extra..Extra

So....seeing that we have a couple followers in addition to our mom I thought we might need to step it up a notch and really let you all into our world....Many mornings, in the rush to get out the door with 4 young kids, I just forget to eat....Such was the case this past Sunday as I didn't even realize I had an empty stomach until we sat down for the sermon.... Gahhhh, I just knew my stomach was going to start growling and the panic that took over me, for fear that others would hear, made my heart race....Why do I even care?? I don't know but, in a dire need to suppress the sounds of my hunger, I ever so quietly started tearing up my church bulletin and eating it....Just a few tiny pieces, but it sure did do the trick....Thanks God for making trees so we could make paper so I could eat a little of it during church....